


Palisades

by milkymelody



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: First Love, M/M, Romance, Songfic, Teenagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-09-16 22:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9291785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkymelody/pseuds/milkymelody
Summary: Kaworu and Shinji start noticing their love for each other, and it all begins with a wasp."But from the light of the rising sun, I noticed something on his shoulder. I couldn’t help but notice a wasp as it bit him, his pale skin reddening soon after. I didn’t say anything,  but that shade of red looks nice on him."





	

**Author's Note:**

> hello!! this is my first fanfiction, so concrit is highly appreciated. the song that is referenced throughout is "The Predatory Wasp of the Palisades is Out to Get Us!" by Sufjan Stevens. you can listen to it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DCav8NvbQQ . hope you enjoy the fic! <3

“Dear Diary,

It was hot and humid today. My shirt was sticky on my skin after we went out earlier. We took our bikes and road to the canyon nearby, tossing rocks to the bottom. It was still dark out, and a few stars gleamed from above. Kaworu pointed to a few constellations and recited their names for me. He does this often, but I don’t mind the repetition. I like being with Kaworu.

But from the light of the rising sun, I noticed something on his shoulder. I couldn’t help but notice a wasp as it bit him, his pale skin reddening soon after. I didn’t say anything,  but that shade of red looks nice on him.”

 

    The string of white led lights illuminated the wood below me as I closed my diary. The glow from them was limited, but still enough for me to see my writing, loopy and almost illegible. This diary was a present to me from my therapist, as we couldn’t meet often and I needed release for my thoughts. My eyes casted over to a pile of clothes on the floor. Some legwarmers, and a coat. My adopted mom often scolded me for this- to the point it became a daily occurrence:

 

“I need to bundle up Misato, it gets cold in the mornings.”

“Are you still going out with that Kaworu boy?”

“... Yeah.”

“.. Yeah, it does get cold in the mornings.”

 

I could tell she had reservations about Kaworu, since he’s often by himself and seems odd at times. But that’s just how he was.

    Putting the diary on my bedside table, I took a sip of water from my mug. It was lukewarm now, but still nice against my dry lips. I rolled over, taking my blanket with me as I went. My head pressed deep against my pillow as I awaited for sleep. But sleep never came. All that came were thoughts from the previous morning, of Kaworu, and of the wasp. A wasp that bit him on his still shoulder, turning it a rose color. A deep blush spread on my cheeks. _‘Could I… make him a rose too?’_ After I thought it, I tried my hardest to push away those feelings. I knew what dreams like those lead to in the end. Kaworu was my best friend, and that’s how our relationship needed to stay. He was so charming, reliable, knowledgeable, and was nice to hang out with because our loneliness mixed and was made cozy. But I couldn’t turn on him like that, I couldn’t break our friendship like that. Friendship between boys was something you didn’t ever touch, we were supposed to grow up and chase after skirts instead of each other. The lights shone as I pulled the covers closer around me.

 

_There on the wall in the bedroom creeping, I see a wasp with her wings outstretched._

 

    It was late August, and the summer days were starting to fade as the word slowly died with autumn. Mornings were chilly, but the weather still came in hot spurts occasionally. Today was one of those days. I peeled off my striped shirt before the palisades, which acted like a fence to the lake before us. It was pretty private, the fences lining its outskirts as to protect the wilderness on the outside. I watched as Kaworu took off his white button-up, revealing his pasty chest beneath. The groove of his ribs before his stomach was appealing, and before long I realized my staring when his eyes met mine. I quickly looked away, making quick work of my pants so I could jump into the water.

“Ready?”  
“Mhmm, g-give me a sec… Okay, I’m ready now.”

“Good.”

 

Together we jumped into the lake, our splashes interrupting the lazy summer noises around us. The water chilled my skin, making memories come from the last time I had been here. It had only been two weeks before with Kaworu. He had came back from summer camp, and together we rushed to the palisades. I exhaled, and out of my peripheral vision I saw that wasp sting on his shoulder. It was ironic in the fact that it was such a lovely color, but stung like the Devil. It made me think that the wasps of the palisades were out to get us.

We floated upright in the openness together, our bodies close by as we counted clouds in the sky. We discussed their shapes and came up with explanations for them. After a while, we slipped into our cozy silence as the allure of the water engulfed our minds whole. His cool tone interrupted my thoughts, “Can I ask you something, Shinji-kun?” “S-sure.” I swallowed in reply.

 

“Have you ever kissed anyone?”

 

“...” I was still, and the world around me seemed to do the same. A bead of sweat traced my face, rolling around my nose and into my lips. “...No.” I mumbled, standing suddenly against the lake’s sandy bottom. I didn’t want to deal with this problem right now, the one that racked my brain in my slumber.

 

“What, do you want me to kiss you or something?”

 

This was meant fully as a joke, but I felt his hand gently rest on my back. His fingers were long and moist from the summer sweat. I turned, and his soft lips caressed mine. My eyes widened to the extreme, his face was so close to mine, touching mine, his hand resting on my back. All reservations about being boys and the compulsions of girls left me. I knew in this instant that this is what I wanted, and I melted into him. When he pulled away, my eyes flitted open.

 

_I see the wasp on the length of my arm._

 

“I.. like you too.” I breathed, and he smiled in reply. My hands enveloped him, wrapping around his waist and his responded with the same. His head rested on the nape of my neck with utter gentleness. I traveled my hand through his hair, the fibers feeling so nice within my fingers. After a bit, we waded back to the shore and clothes ourselves.

 

From then on we spent as much time together as possible. The wheels of our bikes would hit the pavement, going for miles and miles. We would go anywhere from dirt roads, gravel, concrete, and sometimes no road at all. When we got to our destination he would kiss me, and I kissed back tenderly. With Kaworu, my anxiety was swept away. Lust coursed through my veins as we pressed against each other, sweat dripping onto our t-shirts. We saw great rivers and mountains, following their bends as the wind blew through our hair. At first the ventures to the edge of the canyon scared me, but when the other boy took his hand in mine, I knew that everything was okay.

 

_We were in love, we were in love_

_Palisades, Palisades_

 

“Dear Diary,

_I can’t believe the state I’m in._

_The state of my heart, he was my best friend._

I thought he would always be my friend, but now he is more like a boyfriend to me than anything. My mind twists and turns and gets confused if I think about it too much, but the smile on his face always brings me back down. His kisses pepper those wasp bites, and I hope that we can always kiss.

Today we’re going on a car trip to a cabin that Misato’s dad owned. I can’t write much because there’s no light outside, since it’s dark and all. Kaworu is asleep with his head in my lap. I stroke his white hair, and he nuzzles deeper into my legs. My adopted-mother was a bit hesitant to take him with us, but I insisted that he came. I hope she doesn’t think anything is going on between us…

Kaworu and I still have those pesky wasp bites. My adopted-mom wanted to treat them, but they remind me of love. Anyways, I’ll talk to you later diary.”

 

    The cabin was only a few hours away from us, and civilization left us back in the suburbs of our tiny town. Kaworu and I shared a bed, and Misato was sleeping in the room next to us. When we arrived the house was dark, and Misato passed out almost immediately after a few beers. My boyfriend wasn’t tired at all, and laid with an elbow propped up on the bed, his hand holding up his cheek. Those eyes made me feel weak. Leaning forward, I gingerly brushed my lips against his. He kissed back, pulling me closer with a hand against the back of my head. His lips tasted like cloves from his chewing gum. When we pulled away, he offered me a piece.

It rained most of the time, and the forest would smell of damp leaves. My bug bites itched, and once I scratched them they bled. When it wasn’t raining, Kaworu and I would discover the woods. We found tall pine trees, tiny fox dens, and various berries and herbs that Kaworu would tell me their uses for. Nothing for wasp bites though. Other times, he would read or look out the window as I mindlessly popped tapes into the VCR player.

 

    Now all these memories seem like they’re close enough to touch, but fade when I do so, just like that summer. To be honest, I still lie awake at night wondering, hoping, and touching myself with regard of him even though that was two years ago. A month after we got back, Kaworu disappeared. Horrible rumors cropped up around town that he had ran away, or was trying to cover up a murder, and all sorts of crazy lies. I wanted him back more than anything. When Misato discovers me crying in bed, she yells at me and my therapist says it’s because she doesn’t know how to comfort me. My walkman plays on repeat, a tape of Kaworu’s piano playing. Search parties looked, reports were filed, and ads in the newspaper popped up looking for Kaworu. But they never found him.

 

_I can tell you I love him each day_

_Terrible sting, terrible storm_

_I can tell you_


End file.
